Communication has turned into video conferencing and the same old calls, but the anxiety cannot go away, it has grown even more.
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According to a 2019 British study, 76% of millennials are afraid of talking on the phone. The survey showed that many people experience real physical discomfort when they have to answer calls from strangers. For office workers, this behavior, to put it mildly, does not favor career advancement.
With the onset of the pandemic, everyone went remote. Communication turned into video conferences and the same old calls, but anxiety couldn’t go away, it grew even more.
Why do people born between 1981 and 1996 hate talking on the phone so much? And what will help you overcome your fear? We talked about this with Nikolai Nikiforov, candidate of pedagogical sciences, expert in public speaking, founder of the school of public speaking “The Power of Words”.
FIVE CHARACTERISTICS OF MILLENNIALS
People born in the 80s and 90s have their own characteristics and habits. Here are some of them, the experts’ notes.
1. Messenger and email instead of calling.
Representatives of this generation are very attached to digital technologies and the Internet. No, they were not born “with a phone in their hand,” but they were still able to appreciate the taste of modern technology. They are used to communicating via instant messengers, social networks and email, which makes them inexperienced in telephone conversations.
Millennials find communication via instant messaging and email to be the most effective because they can always cut out an extra word. There are fewer worries about saying something out of place.
2. You need time to “think”.
Millennials prefer so-called asynchronous communication: it gives them the opportunity to think about their answers and choose a convenient time to talk. As a result, young people find themselves in conditions where live communication on the phone seems irrational to them and creates a feeling of discomfort.
3. Social anxiety is common.
Millennials often experience social anxiety, which can also contribute to their fear of talking on the phone. They often run through scenarios of future rejections in their heads beforehand and ultimately decide not to call at all. Young people may feel insecure about taking the initiative or interacting with strangers.
“For example, one of my clients is occasionally faced with the need to make cold calls during his work. In his profession (he is a sales manager at an IT company), this is often an exception, as all requests usually come pre-processed by the call center. This is indicative of how the hero’s body reacts: his posture changes, his cheeks turn pale, his hands become cold. Although exactly a couple of minutes ago he was telling a colorful joke to his colleagues,” says Nikolai Nikiforov.
WHAT IS SOCIAL ANXIETY RELATED TO?
Social anxiety among millennials can be due to several factors. Firstly, they grew up in the digital age and are used to communicating primarily via the Internet. Therefore, they feel more comfortable in the virtual space, where they can control their communication and not come into direct contact with other people.
Secondly, social anxiety may be related to changes in society and culture. Millennials live in a world where social media and the Internet play a major role in communication and interaction. They may feel social pressure to stay connected and active on social media.
Third, social anxiety among millennials may be related to economic and political changes. They faced economic instability and social inequality. This may lead to a feeling of uncertainty about the future.
Finally, social anxiety may be related to individual personality traits. Some people are simply more prone to it, regardless of their age or generation.
76% of millennials are afraid of talking on the phone
Photo: Shutterstock.
WHAT CAN BE THE CONSEQUENCES OF NOT WANTING TO COMMUNICATE BY PHONE?
“Of course, this has a negative impact on professional life,” says Nikolai Nikiforov. – Millennials are often advised to work on their communication skills. But it should be noted that many companies adapt the formats of working with their employees: they use instant messengers, specialized software, and create automatic calls using robots instead of a real employee.
Difficulties in face-to-face communication also negatively affect personal relationships. Millennials have problems in relationships with the opposite sex, find it difficult to get married, etc.
HOW TO OVERCOME YOUR FEAR OF PHONE COMMUNICATION: 5 STEPS
Nikolai Nikiforov gives the following recommendations:
1. Start small: Call your friends and family, then your coworkers. Little by little, you will start to feel more confident and will be able to easily make calls to clients and business partners.
2. It is worth preparing for a telephone conversation in advance; it is best to make a list of questions and answers that may arise during the conversation.
3. It is helpful to use relaxation and meditation techniques before starting a conversation to reduce stress and anxiety.
4. If anxiety is severe, then you can deal with the problem on a physical level, for example, start doing squats, push-ups or dancing actively. Firstly, it will help get rid of adrenaline, and secondly, any tension is followed by relaxation. This is exactly what you need in case of severe anxiety.
If physical activity is not possible, you can rub your palms together for 10 to 20 seconds: this will help you feel warm and energized. You can also tense your muscles for five seconds and then relax them.
5. Working with your breathing can also help alleviate the condition.
“I once performed at the Kazan Circus in front of an audience of 2.5 thousand people. I was scared because the conditions were unusual, I felt like I was in a huge “cauldron” of people. In this case, the natural reaction of “freezing” is often triggered. Breathing helped me cope with stress. For example, there is a good seven-eleven technique: we inhale through the nose, then count to seven, and exhale through the mouth, count to 11. This should be done three times,” Nikolai Nikiforov noted.
