Desire is the power of man. The main thing is to properly manage it.
The holidays are the time to visit, relax and have fun. And it’s time to plan. We think about the coming year, we begin to dream and make plans: “Well, this year definitely… (learn English, join a gym, quit smoking, go to the sea, find a loved one)”. Desires are different, dreams are often hidden.
“I propose to review my desires and approach their fulfillment with the help of a simple psychological technique,” says psychologist Vasilisa Averyanova. – Do not be afraid of your desires. There is a popular misconception that our desires are our weakness. Do not believe it. Desire is the power of man. The main thing is to properly manage it.
And to put a job wish list, you need a pen, paper and half an hour of free time. And now the step by step:
1. Write down all your wishes on a piece of paper.
2. Select the most significant ones. It is not worth solving for a long time, five minutes is enough; the most important thing usually comes to mind first. Now put them in order of importance.
3. See if there are any unfulfillable and unrealizable wishes on the list. Perhaps the implementation of some projects will require considerable effort and time on your part for at least five years. But now we are making a plan for only one year. It makes sense to write clearly. For example, a dream is to learn to dance the tango. But it’s not so easy. Let’s start by writing “to enroll in dance courses.”
TURN WISHES INTO GOALS
No one is calling you to give up global dreams. But it is important that they do not remain an abstract wish list. Therefore, it is important now to think about how you will turn desires into goals. This means that we write the main global desires in the left column, and in the right we make instructions on how to turn them into goals.
For example, a dream is to become the director of a large company. Describe step by step the sequence of your actions. First you need to enter the desired university in the corresponding specialty, graduate, complete an internship at the desired company, get a job there and constantly receive various promotions.
NOW IMAGINE THAT THE WISH HAS COME TRUE
It happens that a person passionately desires something, and when he achieves what he wants, he is disappointed. Therefore, one must have a clear idea: “What, after all, I will get it in the end.” Otherwise, it may turn out that you passionately want something, but it turns out that this is not exactly what you need.
So initially force yourself to fantasize a little about what you will do if your wish comes true. How will you feel then? Are you happy with everything now? Maybe something does not suit you?
For example, if you really want to have a German Shepherd. Imagine you already have it. Yes, yes, here and now, in this small one-room apartment. And tonight, instead of watching your favorite series, you need to cook a special porridge for her. And tomorrow at six in the morning go for a walk with her. And the day after tomorrow, Saturday, she cancels a fun party with friends and takes the dog to the vet for vaccinations. Of course, you will also have to forget about a trip abroad. You will need a place to restrain the dog for the duration of your trip. Do you still want to have a dog? Or maybe you should think about changing your house to a more spacious one, somewhere closer to the park, and then get a four-legged friend?
After thinking about what the wish can lead to, you may want to slightly correct your original dream.
But as the psychologist Irina Chesnova says, not planning anything is also normal: “For several years now, I have only drawn rough outlines of the year in my head, with a dotted line and a pencil. This gives a lot of freedom. And focus more on the current moment: how do I feel now? What is important to me?
That is, it is important to be happy in the moment and not think that you will achieve this or that goal and immediately experience happiness. Let the holidays be slow and lazy. Or active and cheerful. The main thing is that you feel good! Happy New Year to all of us and best wishes fulfilled!