Here is Olga Bergholz’s (we all know her) entry in the Forbidden Journal. No one was supposed to read it. He is 31 years old, a day long, June 4, 1941: “I am a creature of the category of the most insignificant. The novel is worth the trouble and, oh, horror, it seems that I do not feel like writing it. No , I will write at least a little now.
On the mind – trading companies. In fact, they should be implemented. We need money. You must dress well, beautifully, you must eat well. When will I bloom? After all, I am already 31 years old! I kept thinking: there is time, so I will take care of myself, my health, my appearance, my clothes. After all, I have excellent data, and I am as thin as a chip, and all this is from a careless life, from inattention to myself. He could have beautiful shoulders, and only the bones stick out, and another four years, and nothing will help them. And so it is with others. It is necessary to flourish, to show off at least for the last five or seven years, because then old age, wrinkles, no one will look, and I will not need dresses and skirts …
Oh, how little time remains for life and absolutely little for its flowering, which, in fact, has not yet been. And above all this, a close, hanging, almost inevitable war.
She did a lot after. Books, live reports from besieged Leningrad, third marriage (her second husband died in the blockade). And national fame. But this Bergholz record has it all, about us. Fear of time passing, lower self-assessment (as often happens), stronger feeling that one has no time for anything, feeling that fate hangs over everyone, being lost in everything that wants to achieve, but cannot achieve, and confusion, like being with time, not someone else’s, but their own, which is irrevocably and irrevocably nullified, year after year.
So what is to be done? Time is a strange creature: sometimes it bites into your legs, sometimes it barely flows, and you try to kick it: “Hurry up, hurry up!” It seems that he obeys you, and then you solemnly command him: “I will wake up at four in the morning!” And indeed, a miracle takes place, the mechanism of the clock works in you, and you approach the mirror and see the moon still high.
This miracle of turning your orders into consciousness, in the fact that from unconscious non-existence you wake up again, as if on command, to life, inspires the hope that you can at least somehow manage time. And even though time passes and one landscape is replaced by another, it still seems that if you think of time as infinite and set no limits on it, you can act like an infinitely young creature, or at least mature, but at an age where everything burns under your feet
And indeed, everything burns, everything only has to shine in the miracle of converting energy into words, into actions, into people, into twinkling distances. But that only means one thing. That evening, when you are wandering the streets, trying to penetrate the future, you only need to say to yourself: “Everything will last.”
Don’t set time limits. Don’t get hung up on dates. Never measure yourself by time, the past and the future. To have a horizon always slipping towards the edge of the molten sun.
– Do not put limits on yourself and your actions, – so says the gray day, which has not yet had time to approach the twilight line.
There are “time rounding rules” for this. Nothing prevents you from trying them.
Until 40 – yourself at 25. This is how our internal time inevitably works. From 40 to 60 years – by 35-37. Pasha let’s go! Build a family, property! At 60-67 years old, at 40-42. With fully unfolded banners. Everything makes you old, and you swim by. Handle. And enjoy the time. The internal clock is very young. be in love Love: youth 60+, 70+ and over on the rise. Numbers, age – on the periphery of consciousness. Not applicable, abstract, applicable to another person who needs it. Don’t get ahead of time – lag behind, let it get old if it’s unbearable. Eternal movement, eternal turns, eternal thought, eternal work, eternal projects, eternal attempt to hurry. Time is a personal matter. The fact that society sends you along the time axis “to not-so-remote places” doesn’t matter. Yes, there is still a body (a good thing), it is trying to adapt to you. It’s negotiable. And nowhere in a hurry, if you live like that.
Your internal clock should be set to 80+ or even 90+. So most likely it will happen. It’s like saying to yourself: “I’ll wake up at four in the morning.” And you wake up. All your “inside” comes from the time you have given yourself. You yourself set your annual internal rhythm of life.
You just have to imagine it, and you will find yourself in a different time, as if you decided to get up at dawn to do everything. You’re young. You are very young. You have a lot of time ahead of you. All ages have changed. In fact, 90 years is becoming a common age, and 100 years, why not?
And how does it happen? Let’s look at the lyrics. “41! While I feel like 25.” “According to my passport, I am 64 years old, my biological age is 42, but I look terrible, I am 47!” “I started at 97, intuitively.” “Got it at 109!” “130!”. “We sat with my mom (87). At 61 I bought her a referral for driving courses, and she rode the Niva. She’s been driving the Subaru Impreza for 10 years! Niece complains about her fines” for exceeding ” : Calm down grandma! He fears that the deputies will legally limit the driving age!
Another idea came by email. “After the age of 60, it is better to set the internal clock in relative terms: every day with the attitude of another +30”.
So be it! But how to do this when the day follows the day and leads to the next day? When time just disappears “I don’t have time to write or read. I think I’m on a streetcar. I’m forced to eat poisonous garbage, which gives me a fever all day and I don’t understand anything. I sold my time, and if I didn’t , if I did, I would starve to death.However, one way or another, everyone does it, but the bad thing is that I sell my time without profitability.
This is one of the most important events of the first half of our century. It is repeated every day. I get up, thinking about the rush or some other emptiness. I eat and pack. Forced to do this, I put myself in the shoes of the lowest rank of which I am capable.” So wrote the artist Pavel Zaltsman in his diary on April 5, 1941. He survived the blockade. And he had years of creation ahead of him.
So how to be? Friends over 60 are suffering. They have nothing to do, they are trying to entertain themselves. There are rules for this too.
The main thing in him is creativity, in any of its forms. Don’t waste time, don’t kill him with extreme cruelty. Long-term goals are a must. An investment of time: to be more valuable, more expensive for everyone, to reduce the growth of restrictions, every day. Have a project. Better yet, a great project, your own. In sequence. Any, but – movement. To get. Better – in everyone’s interest, not just your own. All this is the key to youth. Not in words, not in inner feelings, in deeds. You have a lot ahead of you to achieve and enjoy. And be extraordinarily valuable, for everyone. All ages have changed. You’re young. What has been achieved in a year? What?
Unusual? No, we tend to think so. Here are the letters: “It is important to ask what I will have time to do for this world created by God.” “I agree: creativity, the value of time, its slowing down, action. But why don’t you allow yourself to return to yourself at least 30 years ago? Acting like then, you get a boost of energy. Where? From yourself from the past to your own future.”
Let our day be scheduled by the clock, when you strive to do everything, but always go off schedule. Therefore, Nikolai Amosov, a surgeon from God, who operated for 53 years and taught everyone to live long, wrote: “All my conscious life I have been looking for long cycles, distant goals, activities when incentives are in me and not in the outside world… It’s all a matter of the balance of stimuli. In its future changes. Man lives and acts only by his own stimuli, even when he sacrifices his life for others. He cannot do otherwise. It will be unhappy if it is the opposite”.
Let there be more incentives, plans, searches, projects! And that, when, according to biblical laws, they want you to live to be 120 years old, this will definitely happen!
