“First, let’s find out why fears and anxiety interfere with us so much. Being in a state of permanent panic, chasing the same thoughts in a circle, our brain overflows with them, there is no place for constructive ideas and balanced decisions. Personal effectiveness is significantly reduced, the ability to plan goals and obtain results at a lower cost”, explains the psychologist.
Five simple steps will help reduce the number of fears and increase personal efficiency.
Step One: Determine the Cause of the Alarm
This is where the intuitive writing technique can come in handy. First you need to sit down and write down all the concerns that come to mind. Then, carefully read what is written and for each item ask yourself the question: “Can I influence what worries me?”
We distribute all the anxieties in two columns: in the first we enter those that we can influence, and in the second – the fears that are beyond our control.
“The anxieties of the second column, among which there will certainly be experiences due to world events, are by no means unfounded and we, of course, cannot cancel our attitude towards them. However, it is in our power to realize that these things do not Do not depend on us. Spending energy on these experiences means subtracting it from the tasks that we are capable of solving. From those problems and anxieties that are located in the first column. They will form your control zone in which you can plan your life “, explains Anna Tsykoza.
Step two: reduce the “anxiety level” with clear language
“Lately, a lot of patients come to me who have anxiety and stress. And the simplest advice is not to make long-term plans. In fact, how can you set yourself some long-term goals if the world changes overnight more beyond recognition? My task is to show them that, in fact, no external factor affects the goals of a particular person, to help them realize the source of anxiety and formulate goals,” says the psychologist.
Here are four simple planning questions that can help:
What do I really want?
How can I implement it?
Why is this important to me?
How will I know that I have achieved the result?
For example, “I want to go on vacation, but I don’t know if I will have that opportunity” is too abstract and there is a clear reference to external factors. But “I want to go on vacation to Bali at the end of 2023, and I need such and such an amount for this” – this is already specific. Immediately the following question arises: “How can I do this?” A more specific writing reduces the level of anxiety, shifts the focus of attention to the task with subparagraphs that contain hypotheses on how to solve it.
Step Three: Analyze Fears
“Our head with anxious thoughts is like a pot of boiling water on a hot stove. The stove is that emotional degree that feeds our fears. If you mentally remove the pan from the stove, that is, you separate emotions and facts.” , you can see the reason for the “AAA, I can’t do it!” status. This could be “impostor syndrome”, a focus on competition, low self-esteem, etc.
In general, anxiety and fear appear when a person has the unknown ahead. Many of us live with an inner “controller” that demands clarity, wants to know everything in advance. But this is impossible. We can anticipate, assume and prepare as far as possible to minimize risks to ourselves. And treat the rest as a hypothesis.
It helps reduce the level of fear, if your own panic “Ahh, I can’t do it!” ask yourself the question: “I wonder how I can do it?” Take the position of the researcher and look at yourself from the side.
Step Four: Exercise
Physical activity “works” in two directions: on the one hand, while doing his body, a person does what is actually in his control zone, and due to this, he is distracted from problems, calms down psychologically.
On the other hand, breathing practices, yoga, meditation and sports help reduce the amount of the stress hormone in the body, cortisol, which is produced by the adrenal glands, and, at least for a while, they saturate your body with happy hormones. – endorphins.
Step Five: Delegation and Discipline
Often the cause of anxiety is the thought that we don’t have time to do anything. It turns out a vicious circle: I have a lot of important tasks, it all depends on me, I cling to different things, I don’t finish them, I constantly worry about this, I work inefficiently and I have even less time …
“Here it is important to understand that one of these cases can be delegated to others. Of course, it is nice to be irreplaceable, but still it is better and more comfortable to do one thing efficiently and well than not to finish ten and then bite yourself.” for this reason”, says the expert.
The ability to delegate is part of the self-discipline to strive for. When we are anxious, we may not realize how time flies. We spend resources thinking, but we do not proceed to action. And here you need to realize at what point your brain “played” in the visualization of future goals, and give yourself the “start” command. Then there will be no time to worry and be afraid.
