No one can argue that school exams are one of the most stressful periods in life. Moreover, this is a feature not only of the current Unified State Exam. When we still took final exams at school and then university entrance exams separately, the stress was double.
But then as now, the main task of parents is to soften the effects of stress and support their children.
Education expert Aktion (part of the Aktion group), associate professor of the Department of General Humanities and Psychology of the Moscow Institute of Technology and Management (MITU), Alexandra Fokina, explained how to cope with stress before the Unified State Exam and gave some tips and Instructions for parents and children.
1. Calm tone
Discuss exams in a calm tone, do not burden your child with your own fears, uncertainties or negative forecasts. Make sure communication is not limited to just discussing exams.
“Successfully passing the Unified State Exam means being able to concentrate and demonstrate in an exam situation those skills that have already been practiced many times at school and often with a tutor. It is important for adults to remember that each of them contributes to this. ability of the graduate,” says Alexandra Fokina.
2. Don’t bully and worry
Show care and support, rather than being condescending and controlling. Show unconditional love. Let your child know that he can count on you in any situation, regardless of test results.
“Helping a child prepare for exams means helping him take advantage of what he can do. Mistakes that adults can make: fixation on weaknesses (instilling anxiety, guilt) and lack of dialogue (the child remains unattended to his emotions, experiences , or you receive a series of ready-made advice (“study and you will pass!”) without taking into account what exactly you need in the most unfortunate cases in life,” says Fokina.
3. Correct way
Make sure your child takes short, regular breaks during preparation. It is important to be able to do without coffee and strong tea. Preparing for exams with the television on can also cause a lot of damage. But if a child wants to work with music, don’t interfere.
Agree that the night before the exam all preparation will stop and your graduate will take a walk, shower and go to bed on time. The last twelve hours should be dedicated to preparing the body, not knowledge.
4. Be on equal terms
“Keep a calm business dialogue with your child, so that he can come to you for advice and help without fear. Talk as you would with a young colleague or friend: to the point, without getting into personal topics. Also help him to know the basic concepts, types of tasks and often practice them (not necessarily on long tasks: the skill is trained due to the frequency of repetition, not the duration; it is better to solve one standard task five times a week than twenty tasks once a week. ), “, advises Alexandra Fokina.
Techniques to relieve stress and fears
Create a safe word or expression
If the obsessive fear of “I won’t pass the exam” invades you, invent a word or expression that slows down its development. For example: “I’ll think about it tomorrow”, “Enough!” You can also imagine fear as an image drawn on a piece of paper and mentally burn it.
change the registry
Change things up: get some exercise, go for a walk, call a friend, do some spring cleaning. You must tell your brain to start doing something else, to perform a new task. And it is important that not only the body is busy, but also the brain.
Mentally surrender to fear. Let me take you, let me “show” you the “terrible” ending: you didn’t pass the exam. And ask yourself: “What happens if I don’t pass the exam?” Understand the real consequences of the worst case scenario. Pay attention to what scares you the most. The answer to this question will help you understand what you are doing.
exhale inhale
Several breathing techniques that will help relieve anxiety during the exam:
Mentally count from 1 to 5 and breathe deeply. Hold your breath for a count of 1 to 5 and exhale slowly. Do the exercise 5 times. Inhale gently and slowly through your nose. Feel your chest, diaphragm, and abdomen expand. Exhale slowly, in reverse order. First, the stomach should sink, then the chest, inhale quickly 3-4 times and exhale slowly. The main thing is to control exhalation.
